This morning, I want to share with you my own personal experience of Pentecost.

We often think of the Holy Spirit as something that is wild and brings chaos and disorder to our world, and sometimes it does, but other times the Holy Spirit works to bring us together, to find our commonality and to form community.

This is what I experienced several years ago.

So here is my story.

My Pentecost event occurred about 10 years ago when I spent a week with a group of Episcopal clergy.

The purpose of this conference was clergy wellness.

Every 5-10 years all Episcopal clergy are invited to one of these conferences.

I recently attended one in California, but that is not the conference I am going to talk about today.

The conference at which I had my Pentecost experience was my second CREDO conference.

During these CREDO conferences, clergy are given the opportunity to examine several very important aspects of our lives–physical, emotional, vocational, financial and spiritual health.

These conferences offer us a chance every few years to step outside of our everyday lives and to take some time to reflect on our own health and well being.

So, with all this in mind, 20 of us from around the country made our way on to Salter Path, North Carolina.

18 of the 20 of us had to fly to get there and our final destination airport was in New Bern, North Carolina.

Now, New Bern airport is a tiny little airport with only 3 gates, so there aren’t too many flights going there.

The 18 of us who were flying were all on one flight from Charlotte to New Bern.

None of us knew each other, so as we began arriving at our departure gate, we were all trying to figure out who the other Episcopal clergy were.

Now some were easily identifiable to me.

There is a certain look that some male Episcopal clergy have.

I immediately picked out one man who was dressed in perfectly ironed kaki pants, an immaculate linen sports jacket, and a bow tie with crosses on it as one of us.

I approached him and introduced myself.

Gradually, we all found each other, and we began to nervously talk with one another.

“Where are you from?”

“What is your church like?”

“What’s your average Sunday attendance?”

“How long have you been there?”

“What seminary did you graduate from?”

These were the questions we asked one another.

There was a great deal of anxiety present in this newly formed group, for I want to let you in on a little secret, gatherings of clergy are not always fun.

Like all human beings we too put on masks.

Like all human beings we too can be competitive with each other and therefore not honest with one another.

So, we were all anxious.

What was this week going to be like?

Would this be like any number of other joyless clergy gatherings we have been a part of in which we all set around and either competed with one another or complained about the decline of the church?

So, we boarded the airplane and made our way to the coast of North Carolina.

Our first evening together was pretty much a continuation of the anxiety that was present in the airport.

But Tuesday morning was a different kettle of fish.

We met together for a lecture on creating a rule of life–this was our primary task for the week.

And then we broke up into small groups.

These groups were created by the faculty of the conference.

We did not choose our small groups.

I found myself in a group with two men and another woman.

One of the men I had known in a previous diocese, and I had always thought he was a little arrogant.

As you can imagine I wasn’t thrilled that we were in a group together.

But we plunged into it all.

We had done some pre work before the conference looking at events from our past.

And our first task was to share some of the things we had learned as we looked at our past lives.

One of the members of our group took a huge risk and shared something very traumatic from his past that could have potentially caused us to see him in a very negative light.

Then the man in our group that I had always seen as arrogant shared with us the pain he had been living through for the past 3 years.

And the floodgates opened.

Our group became a safe place where all four of us were able to be vulnerable and completely honest with one another–the Holy Spirit was beginning her work amongst us.

When we gathered back together as a large group it became very apparent that what had happened in my small group had happened in all of the small groups.

All five of the small groups had profound experiences of vulnerability and sharing.

Now, I need to emphasize again that this is extraordinarily unusual in clergy groups.

This is almost unheard of.

What began that morning and continued throughout the week was in my eyes truly miraculous.

We clergy tend to be lone rangers, working by ourselves in our parishes, and in less than 24 hours this ceased to be and we became a community.

We began the week speaking 20 different languages and not understanding each other and by our closing Eucharist we were speaking one language and we understood each other completely. The holy spirit had swept through our group creating honesty, unity, community, and most importantly healing.

As I spoke with others on our final day with each other, every single person in that group left changed.

We were honest with one another, and the holy spirit took that honesty and used it to change us.

The Holy Spirit is always whipping around us, so why does it take root in our hearts sometimes and other times it doesn’t?

Well, I think there are two answers to this question-first, we have been given free will.

God never forces the Divine will on us.

We are not puppets with God as the puppet master.

So, the Holy Spirit will not force herself on us.

And secondly, we must make ourselves vulnerable through relationships with each other for there to be space for the Holy Spirit to enter our hearts and our community.

These 20 people that gathered in North Carolina took the leap of vulnerability.

We opened the door of our hearts just enough for the Spirit to enter in, and enter in she did, and she blew the doors off of our closed hearts.

What risks are you taking in this community?

In what ways are you making yourself vulnerable to others here at St. Andrew’s?

In order to risk and to make yourself vulnerable, this place, Christian community, God, has to take a primary place in your heart.

First and foremost, you have to show up.

Now, I know I am speaking to the choir here this morning, you are the ones who have shown up, but it is important to remind ourselves of the importance of showing up.

If I had not gone to that conference, I definitely wouldn’t have had that Pentecost experience.

If we don’t show up here for the ministries and worship in this place, the Holy Spirit can’t build community here either.

The next step after showing up is participating.

I could have gone to North Carolina and been physically present in all the activities of the conference, but still not been open to the Holy Spirit.

I had to give myself to the experience and fully participate in the activities and the relationships present there.

You can come here every Sunday, but if you don’t open yourself up to the opportunities for ministry and the opportunities for relationships in this place, you will probably find that the door of your heart just will not allow the Holy Spirit in.

And finally, I had to be open to change.

I had to be willing to see things in a new way and to learn new things.

When I went to that conference I was struggling with a number of issues, and I had been praying to God for guidance and help in a number of areas.

I had not yet received clarity, but through my prayer God had prepared me to be open to the people and experiences I was to have that week and it was this openness, this willingness to be open to change and to be changed that finally allowed me to be fully a part of the work of the Holy Spirit during that week.

What is your prayer life like?

How open are you to change within yourself, those you love and this community?

The Holy Spirit is always present with us.

The Holy Spirit is always present in this community, but we have to open ourselves up to this presence if we here at St. Andrew’s wish to participate in the work of the Holy Spirit.

Is the door of your heart open or have you locked it shut tight?

Are you willing to risk yourself in your relationships here?

Are you willing to learn new things?

Are you open to change within yourself and this community?

I am sure that if we open ourselves up to the work of the Spirit, we will find an energy unleashed in our midst that is more powerful and amazing than we could ever imagine, and the Holy Spirit will create within this place the community we’ve always wanted but never knew we really needed.